Weekend, red and more...

It's 3:20pm and i'm done with classes for the day. I had a very interesting marketing class and an okish operations one. I spent the entire weekend indoors(Welcome to my life). I am such a hermit lol! Anyway, sans the royal fuck up that's PHCN, I had a good weekend. It was sleep, more sleep, youtube, my hair, series, series, food, sleep, my hair and more series. A fab weekend in  my books :D. Nothing beats just doing you. I was supposed to go have some coldstone(I've heard so much about this place) icecream with my boss but i was too lazy to get off my bed. My friend also invited me for a party at his that involved drinking games and the Lagos fashion week after. My cab guy was majorly responsible for my not going but i was also quite finicky seeing as he informed me late. Let's go back to my hair....

I wore my afro out last week and had a ton of fun trying out different hairstyles. I've decided to wear the fro out this week as well. I spent most of yesterday watching natural hair videos on youtube and ended up doing bantu knots on my hair. I wore the bantu knots to school today and i'll probably have it in knots for two more days before taking the knots out and wearing it in a bantu knot out(another natural hair style). Three of my friends are currently transitioning(natural hair lingua) and I want to do one of their BCs(a natural hair acronym meaning big chop). I'm currently obsessed with the colour red. My nails, lips and loops are red today. I want to put red highlights in my hair. I was going to dye the whole thing red but the business world may not look too fondly at that idea so random red streaks will have to do.....for now.

I started typing this post yesterday but I had to put it on hold as my attention was needed urgently elsewhere. Anyway, It's 6am now and my finance case needs my immediate attention but I need to vent for a bit. Swift(an internet service provider in Nigeria) customer service center reps are so going to get it from me this morning. Recently, they've been showing such high levels of ineffectiveness. The other day, I couldn't log-in to my account. I was told either my username or password was incorrect which was absolute bollocks seeing as after a couple of hours, the same username and password worked. Last night, I changed my service plan and till i went to bed, my account with the ISP did not reflect this but my bank account had been debited so in essence, I couldn't access the internet. I woke up this morning to find out that internet access had been restored but my account details don't make any sense. First of all, my service plan has not been changed although I was charged for the new plan which is more expensive. Secondly, it says I have used 2.3GB of data between last night and this morning which is virtually impossible as I have been sleeping. Thirdly, it says my expiry date is the 22nd of December which also makes no sense as I paid for just one month. The most annoying part of all this is that I'll be charged for the call i make to their customer service reps and from past experience, I'll be on hold for what seems like forever and when they eventually get to me, the line will get interrupted mid-conversation and I'll have to start the process all over again. URRRGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!

In other news, I am seriously considering getting the iphone 5 and as usual, I have been doing a ton of research on the phone. I wish I knew someone who owns one so I could question 'em extensively(I'm such an OCD patient when i want to purchase a new gadget). My dad hit me up on bbm late last night and I was smiling throughout the convo. You see, he isn't really a techie person so it's always so cute when he makes the effort to "use technology" lol! Anyway, now i'm thoroughly homesick :(. I'm also stuck on that piece I told you about and the deadline is around the corner. I need inspiration.

Till I can find some,
Live,
Smile,
Afrobooboo

Real vs Unreal

I had the weirdest dream last night. One of the Niger delta big boys recently moved into my estate and the front of his house is always filled with cars and random men. Literally ALL the time i go by, people are sitting outside drinking or chatting or just staring. I can't avoid his house because it's on the way to/from mine *sigh*. Anyway, I dreamt of this man(whom I have never met/do not even know what he looks like). In my dream, he was trying to recruit my flatmate and I. Some type of temporary tattoo was being drawn on our arm with the promise of a permanent one to come. We were told we had two days to decide if we were going to accept to get the permanent version(which he had already promised us was going to be extremely painful). I remember running home and immediately calling my mum. I was so frantic and i kept telling her I had to relocate because I was scared for my life. I obviously was not planning to get the permanent version so my answer in two days will definitely be NO. During the duration of this dream, I felt like it was all real. Even after i woke up, it took about two minutes to finally realise it was all a dream and extremely unreal.

I woke up to a tweet on my twitter timeline this morning which read: 

"So you gained weight in over a period of 5 years, and you want it gone in 2 months.....makes sense???"

Now there is a context to which this tweet would in itself have made sense but the author failed to include that caveat and that in itself, made this tweet extremely debatable. Of course you can lose weight that was gained over a period of five years in two months. I don't think the focus should have been on the period over which the weight was gained but instead the amount that was gained. I personally know a ton of people who have achieved this with the most recent being my college friend Joan who lost hers through weight watchers. You need to see her today. She went from a size 12/14 to a size 6/8 in less than two months i might add. In my opinion, the real question should be "How much weight was gained?". "Weight gained over a period of five years" is an extremely subjective measure. You could gain from as little as 5 pounds to as much as 100 pounds over a period of five years. That tweet could both be very real and very unreal as well.

I spent the latter part of my yesterday interviewing some students for five spots in a club I co-founded with four others. The name of this club alone is a good way of deducing the qualities we are looking for in the candidates we will eventually choose and in my opinion, a great way of disqualifying yourself before wasting ten minutes of my time. Every time i interview people, I sympathize with people on the HR(Human relations) track. Ten minutes in, and all i want to do is rip my hair out and scream. Imagine doing that as a career. HELL NO! You ask a candidate a question and he/she spends five minutes telling you why that question is a very good question. Like come on! Of course I know it's a good question. That's why i asked it damnnnit!!! Let's just say my frustration level was at an all time high and after everything, only one candidate impressed me. People really need to learn how to go straight to the point during interviews. The interviewers more often than not have a ton of people to interview. Beating about the bush only makes you a thorn in their side. I am still wondering how some of the people I interviewed could have realistically thought they were a good fit. Case of real being soooo unreal. 

It's friday(In case you weren't aware :p) whhoooppp!!!!!! I honestly don't have anything planned for the weekend but it's always awesome knowing you have two days to just sleep if that's all you plan to do. I have a marketing plan to turn in very soon and I have decided to use one of my family businesses for the plan. I'm very excited about that. Dunno if i told you guys i was going for the John Molson case competition in January. Totally looking forward to that as well although there's so much to do in terms of getting ready. I am trying to feel like a winner. I never do that because i always think it is unrealistic. I mean it is safe to assume everyone participating in the competition has what it takes to win. All you can realistically do is your best right? Well.....this time, i want to tell conventional real to take a hike and embrace the idea that I WILL WIN(my team that is). I will also go out on a limb and call that real as well albeit unconventional.

My song for the day is "River" by Emeli Sande.

 Till tomorrow or next,

Smile,

Live,

Afrobooboo

Wham, Bam, Kazzam, Complex!!

This morning has been all about the US presidential election. Votes were cast, counted and speeches were given. Apparently Romney didn't have a concession speech 'cause he was so sure he was going to win. What do you know about faith? Anyway, Obama has been re-elected from all indication so yay!!
Continuing from yesterday's post, i went out after SB's birthday and i had the weirdest and most baffling conversation ever. It was like wham, bam, kazzzam...you hear this, now you hear that but i'm not on drugs or cheap bleach. Yea I know i'm losing you lol! I'll try my best to re-enact the conversation i had but people are indeed weird creatures.

I'm quietly sipping on my henny and coke and enjoying the view from where i'm seated...

Dude: Do you smoke?
Me: Nope
Dude: Do you drink a lot?
Me: Nope. Just occasionally
Dude: I wanted to stay in tonight but my friend dragged me out. 
Me: ok
Dude: Tell me about yourself
Me: *chuckle* I hate that question. If you want to get to know someone, get to know the person. Don't take the easy way out. I never answer that question unless it's a job interview
Dude: I'm sure many people ask you that
Me: dunno
Dude: I wouldn't be feeling this place if i wanted to go out. It's too dull. Do you like dancing?
Me: Yea but I don't feel like dancing. I'm fine right here
Dude: I'd like to be your friend. A very close friend. Like if i don't talk to you for two days, i'd be worried
Me: err...... I don't make close friends like that.
Dude: oh! why?
Me: I don't trust people
Dude: ok. 

Almost an hour later and after many in-between conversations with other people,

Dude: Like Peter just said, I'm married and my wife trusts me and i can do whatever i like. She's in the states
Me: ok.......
Dude: I'm not asking for anything else. I just want to be your close friend. Like for real. The kind of friend you can depend on and call when you're in a jam and if i can, i'll come bail you out. You getting me?
Me: I guess.....
Dude: yea. like we can hang out and i can come visit you and we can be friends
Me: ok (hesitantly. i'm still gauging the dude)

At this point, i'm thinking i may have been too quick to judge the dude. I mean he is married (not like married guys are always faithful but he could be among the faithful bunch) and i met him through a good friend of mine who shall be called Peter for the duration of this post but i was getting a weird vibe and i always trust my instincts.

Me: I think i'm going to quickly dash off to another spot. I want to see a close friend. Haven't seen him in forever and i hardly come out.
Dude: where is he?
Me: not too far from here
Dude: ok. I can take you
Peter: Cool. My clients are here and i'm kinda working so Dude taking you works. Just call when you want to come back and we'll come get you.
Me: ok
*exit Peter*

Less than a minute later,....
Dude: who is this person you are going to see?
Me: How does that matter?
Dude: well....I wouldn't want to take you to go see someone that is below me.
Me: HUH???
Dude: I am a CEO and i don't know who this person is. 
Me: WTF?? What are you saying exactly? You can't take me?
Dude: That's not what i'm saying. I can't take you to see someone that's below me. I can give the car keys to Peter and he'll take you.
Me: o wow!! You just heard Peter say he is working. I'll go take a cab but in future, put your money where your mouth is
Dude: My money is where my mouth is but I'm a CEO. The car i brought is the least of the cars I have. I know you're a big girl but i'm bigger than this guy. You just watch
Me: WTBF??? who cares what car you brought? Why are you comparing yourself to Close Friend? We aren't trying to date or anything so what does it matter? 
Dude: I'm not trying to date you. You just watch out for me. I own houses. I'll give my keys to Peter.

At this point, I feel like i'm the lead character in a terrible movie. WT..actual..F?? You couldn't make this shit up even if you tried.

Me: What happened to the speech you just gave about wanting to be friends and being close etc? You know what, let's just keep it moving. I'm about to get really pissed off if you keep talking to me.
Dude: You just watch out for me. I'm bigger than the guy you want to go see. i don't know what this guy does. 
Me: Please stop talking to me. You have such a complex it's amazing. Who gives a bleep about what you have? WTH?? 
Dude: I don't care what he has either. I don't know this area that well. I'll give the keys to Peter if he wants to take you
Me: So Peter isn't a CEO yea? Fucktard.

I totally lost it. I called his ass out to Peter immediately. I was so angry. I probably can't remember some of the shit he said but it was a truck load of BS mixed with a ton of confusing and decorated with a bucket of inferiority complex. Why do some guys feel the need to compare themselves to other people even when no one could care less? What type of complex do some people have? Does it stem from their upbringing or was he just showing off his jealous side? I guess i'll never know. After a few choice words between Peter and himself, he took me. I wanted to take a cab but Peter wouldn't have that. Urrrggghhh!!! Anyway, I had an awesome (rest of the) night.

Yesterday was an AMAZING day. We had GE(General Electric) day in school and i met a lot of awesome people and won the opportunity to hang out with the GE Execs at their office sometime soon. Totally looking forward to that. Have I said B-school rocks today? Well...there. I have a finance test on Thursday so today is study day. I think it'll be a good day.

My song for today is "Roses' by Nas. I'm currently writing a piece for a project I'm a part of based on this song.

Till tomorrow,

Smile,
Love,
Afrobooboo

2 years later....

It's been two years and some days since i was last on my blogger. Feels like just yesterday although SO MUCH has happened. I've missed this. Just talking.... I feel like I can't do this on my wordpress because I've kinda branded(practicing my B-school lingua. I'll get to that in a second) the blog to be about creative stories and i can't just go on there and ramble. Don't get me wrong, i'm always excited when i'm able to create a story i love but nothing beats just letting loose. I have two years worth of pent up rambling in me and i just want to scream.

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

So I've decided to come back here...where it all started, to just talk. I finally went natural. Yep! I'll be two years in December. Totally LOVE my afro. I love it so much, i changed my instagram handle to afrobooboo but instragram keeps using my old handle then correcting it after what feels like donkey years(about 30secs but who's counting?) uugghhh! So i changed it back to the old handle this morning. I'm still looking for where to use afrobooboo though.....*thinking*. I started B-school a year and some months ago and it's been awesome so far. I feel like i am only just going to school lol. I go to class and i learn. That hardly ever happened in University. I'm sure many people can relate. If you can't, well count yourself among the lucky few. It's been extremely value adding thus far. I worked briefly in an oil & gas servicing company during the summer break and that was awesome as well. I think i fully appreciated all i'd done in B-school then. I built financial models, process flow charts, Tem...ok ok i'm stopping. I can almost hear a lone snore in the corner(Yes i said lone. bite me). You get the drift though...It's been a brilliant experience. I worked in the music industry for a bit as well during my two years away from here. That was extremely eye opening. I have a lot of respect for the industry now and i made a lot of friends. It's really not as easy and many people don't appreciate the hard work that's been/is being put in.

Back to the present though....I miss my friends and my family a lot. I'm so far away from everyone and everything, it's annoying. It'll all be over in July though so yay! I've been counting down religiously. lol. I got chosen by my B-school to represent 'em in a case competition in Canada in January so I've been preparing for that. I'm very excited but it's been very stressful. I've had to joggle that with my usual school load, my other non-school load and life in general. *whew*. Again, not easy. I think I want to have a kid soon. I LOVE my friend's kids. I'm such a softie whenever i'm around them. They get whatever they want. I think the universe is telling me to start thinking about settling down. I've always wanted to get married and have kids early so i'm not averse to the idea but with all that's going on in my life, i don't know. Anyway, i've been thinking about babies lately. I haven't had a gummy bear in FOREVER. I feel like someone is punishing me. I don't have time to go buy some and the ones I love take quite a journey to get. urrrgghhh!! You'd think the universe would hear my cry and get some supermarket owner to start stocking em in my area. hmmm....now i think of it, maybe i should suggest it to one of the supermarkets. I'll buy everything. lol.

It was SB's birthday on the 2nd and seeing as she's amongst the few people that can get me out of my zone, i was at hers. I've missed her so. She's now a big auditor(I feel like inserting yes ke cos that's what she'd say lol). Whenever i remember the ICAN period, I'm always very excited for her. She's still as tall as ever(not like i was expecting a shorter version. in fact, just scratch that). I had an awesome time. We didn't really catch up cos she had a couple of people over but hopefully, soon we will. I went from hers to one of em club spots and had a conversation with a guy that's most definitely going to inspire my next post. I am very sure i had a WTH expression on my face. Dude was just something else. Anyway, it's 6am now and i need to go get ready for school. I haven't read any of the two cases I have for the day and class participation is very important here.

My song for the day is Breaking the law by Emeli Sande. I've been all about her recently.

Smile,
Love,
Afrobooboo (yay!! I found where to use it :p)

New Address

Like the name of this post implies, we've moved house. The weather condition plus road condition in this area wasn't favourable at all. Plus Nepa was just being stingy with their light so we have decided to live near the governor so we'll be having constant electricity. We can now be found at http://astoldbynono.wordpress.com Tnx for all your support so far. Its been duly appreciated.

Yours Sincerely,
Nono.

What next???

Location: A town house in the heart of Lagos
Date: 22nd Sept, 1960

She was so excited she couldn't sit still but she had to or else she would wrinkle her outfit and that just wouldn't do. She kept glancing at the telegram she had received two days earlier.

"See you thursday stop can't wait"

Well thursday was here and with it all her pent-up excitement. She hadn't seen him since he had been recruited to help with the independence day preparations. Apparently a lot had to be done before that day and many hands were needed. She knew all there was to know about her country and she was "prouder" than ever knowing the man that was courting her was going to help make the dreams of many become a reality. She heard a knock on the door and she knew he was the one. Left to her, she would have flown straight into his arms but her mother was in the next room and she had to behave herself. She looked up and there he was. His six foot self immaculately dressed. She felt so much pride. He came into the room and took the seat opposite hers. He then proceeded to ask after her health while she questioned him about the independence day. Their eyes told a different story however....
His eyes: I have missed you
Her eyes: You know I have missed you more
His eyes: wish I could take you in my arms right now and just hold you
Her eyes: *blush*
His eyes: I can't wait to make you mine.
Her eyes: I can't wait to be yours
His eyes: You look radiant
Her eyes: *blush*
His eyes: I practically ran down here so I won't waste the seconds I had to spend with you
Her eyes: *blush* *looks away* stop jo. You are making me smile stupidly
His eyes: I love your smile
Her eyes: I love everything about you
*a bit more of the harmless flattery/flirting and he takes his leave*


Location: The same town house in the heart of Lagos
Date: 22nd Sept, 2010

She paces up and down. What is making him so late? She looks down at the blackberry message she had received from him that morning

"Heyy babe! We are still on for today abi? Let me know so I can plan my day. ur parents are gonna be out right? We need to continue from where we left off...."

Of course she had replied him aeons ago telling him she'd be alone and she couldn't wait to see him. She smiled slightly as she remembered the things he had done to her and how he had to hurriedly leave out the window 'cause her dad had come back unexpectedly. He was supposed to be busy with the independence day preparations not that she knew what he was celebrating. The huge refuse dump in front of their house was enough for her not to see anything worth celebrating. Fifty ni fifty ko. Mscheww! Granted she knew almost nothing about her country but that wasn't important to her. Infact she placed her blackberry at a level of higher importance than she did her country. She Pinged him. Dude wasn't replying. She hoped for his sake he was driving and almost at her house. She heard the door bell ring. FINALLY! She ran to open the door and gave him a hug. He asked if her parents were around before coming in. She laughed and told him her dad hadn't left yet. He followed her to the parlour. They sat down and talked...
Him: I thought you said you'd be alone
Her: I thought Popsi would have left by the time you got here na
Him: Omo the guy scares me o. Lol
Her: don't worry if he comes in I'll just tell him we are waiting for Aisha to get here so we all go to the mall
Him: ok o! Just don't get me into any trouble. My ankle is still recovering from that my jump out of your window
Her: LOL! Pele
Him: don't worry you will massage it *evil look*
Her: lol! When your mates were doing high jump in secondary school what were you doing? Kpanshing?
Him: You already know
*they both laugh. Shortly after, her father leaves and she takes him to her room*


Location: The same location but a new house
Date: 22nd Sept, 2060

What will happen then among the youth/young adults? Will people still get married? Will they still obey their parents? Will anything still be sacred? Will we have teleportation? Will there still be romance? How about flirting? Will the state of our country be any better? How about our leaders? Will technology be so advanced you can get a message just by someone thinking about it? Will a new species have taken over the earth? In fact will the world still be?
Questions....questions....questions. Only time will tell I guess.....deuces!

Oga/Madam Park Well.

So i'm scrolling through my blackberry messenger status updates and i see one from my friend that goes "she is not worth dying for". I have been laughing for the past fifteen minutes. I find this statement incredibly funny. Infact funny is an understatement. Of course he/she isn't worth dying for. Dude and i are in the same age group(20's) and i honestly DO NOT think at this point in our lives there is anyone worth dying for. Dude isn't even married not that that would even count. The other day i was watching a series and this couple went in for a divorce. All the dude wanted from the lady was his liver lol. Apparently when she was in her almost dead situation she had an epiphany and made a vow to enjoy her life if she ever got better. Dude as a good husband found out he was a match  and offered her a part of his liver. Of course she accepted and got better. Now this is where things get tricky. Apparently her epiphany didn't include her husband. just his liver. Now the dude could have died during the liver extraction process. I doubt she even thought of that. All that concerned her was herself. You see, we are a very selfish breed. The sooner we accept this, the better off we would be.

Now i know some people would give me the love argument. well..... it depends on your relationship with me. If you are my child, hell yea. Any other relationship can like to park well. In fact the driver can like to spend some time straightening the tyres. Like my friend would say, "i dinna know you". I see my girlfriends crying over broken relationships and threatening to kill themselves. Those that know me well don't try this in my presence. i would help u buy the gun, bleach, perfume, acid, knife, etc. Whatever rocks your boat. You are of course allowed to grieve and all that. I mean you've just been dumped(only the dumped are allowed to grieve. The dumpers aren't) but that doesn't include ending your life. I think this my mentality is the reason i hate the line "i will die for you". whether it's in a love song or it's being uttered directly to me i find it very difficult(impossible) to believe. I have not figured out all the nooks and crevices of this love business but i know no one is worth dying for. At least not yet. If it's your turn to die it means God said so. Why the hell would i wanna mess with that??

The greater good!!!

I realise it's been a while since i was here and i apologise profusely. I can't promise it won't happen again 'cause i'm only human but i can promise to put in effort towards updating regularly. Anyways it has come to my attention that i'm a terrible parent. My laptop had the audacity to call me so. Ok lets start at the beginning.

Four years ago i was in the market for a new laptop. My previous one was just not keeping up anymore and the arthritis had set in. He informed me that it was time to get a replacement and i joyfully obliged. I walked into bestbuy with no idea of what i wanted to get. Granted i had done my research and all that but i just couldn't pick one lol. They were all so lovely(anything was lovely compared to my old laptop). I walked the aisles staring and examining the different laptops. It was love at first sight. He was a beaut and he had everything. You know that feeling you get when you see a perfect male specimen(yes he is perfect at first sight 'cause he hasn't opened his mouth yet. i have a theory about people ruining things once they open their mouths but that's a post for another day). Anyways, you know the feeling right? like a soundtrack is playing from far away and only both of you can hear it. If you haven't felt this yet you need to relocate or better yet carry a boombox around.

*soundtrack on* I walked towards my soon to be new baby. I know he saw me too 'cause he immediately glistened(now i think about it, that might have been a mating call. O well....). He was perfect. Had everything i needed and more. The sales assistant immediately came over but i waved him away(apparently it is natural not to listen to any one when we think we are in love *sigh*). I picked him up and went to pay(i don't shop lift). Now our relationship would have been one for the books but what would we be without Uncle Murphy? He of course paid us a visit and i stopped at circuit city on my way home. There i fell in love with a pink laptop skin. I still think cupid was at work 'cause i would never buy anything pink on a normal day and least of all for a male laptop but buy it i did. My laptop was immediately christened a cross dresser lol. I found it incredibly amusing. I still do. He of course didn't see anything funny in it lol. By dressing him in pink i ensured he stayed a virgin for life. You see, he is not an experimenter and would never take it up the butt. Now ladies would you follow a guy that comes to "chyke" you in a gown?? See his predicament and true to the parent in me i refused to change the skin. Every mother wants their kid to remain a virgin for life and i was no different. I wish he could understand this. You see my brothers all recently got new laptops and lets just say their new babies are the cream of the cream. Fresher ladies i haven't seen. My lappy has been ogling em since. He cannot of course go introduce himself 'cause of the pink so the insults are back. He blames me for all his unhappiness. *sigh*.

I'm sure you're wondering why i haven't taken off the case by now and i'll explain. I'm sure we are all familiar with "conji"/"agro"/"horniness". Now imagine a 40 year old(eqivalence of four laptop years) man about to have sex for the first time. Won't you be scared for the unlucky female?? Rape toh bad. The way i see it, i'm doing the laptop community a favour. If i take off that skin, people's laptops won't be able to come on(walk in our lingua). It's a sad sad situation but the way i see it, i've got no other choice. It's for the greater good. My hands are cuffed.

PS: He used to be called Ty but he refused to bear the name so now i just call him Lappy. I can't shout.

The Present, The Certain.

I was walking down the road the other day when a strange guy ran past me. My initial instinct was to run in the same direction as the guy seeing as i had no idea what was in front or why the man appeared to be in such a hurry but then i said to myself "Nono you will look stupid if you just start running after this guy o and at the end of the day he is just in a hurry. Nothing alarming" so i reduced my pace and kept going forward. Just then i spotted the bus turning in from the highway. Then it hit me. He was trying to get to the bus stop before the bus. I immediately had a grin on my face and stopped to see if he would make it. He didn't. Timing huh??

They say timing is everything. Well since that day i've been thinking about that word timing. A friend of mine just had a close encounter with timing too and i was there telling her timing was everything and maybe in a different time/place, the outcome would have been different. Now i see the error in my/our ways. Who are we to know what would have/wouldn't have happened had we stopped for a few seconds to tie our shoelaces instead of moving on and getting hit by the bus; had we hurried out of the house when we wanted to instead of staying to apply some more lipstick which led to us being inside when the house collapsed. Well i think the bus would have also stopped for a few seconds to pick up somebody and we would have rushed out of the house only to realise we forgot something which would have led to us going back into the house. I don't think there is a scenario you could give me on timing for which i wouldn't have a counter scenario. Funny thing is since we obviously aren't God we can only really be sure of the known. The present. Who is to say your "favourable" scenario wouldn't have led you to a worse off outcome. So it all comes back to what DID happen and how we can to the best of our abilities, handle what DID happen.

What will be will be. We can't beat fate no matter how hard we try. We can only take comfort in the unknown which to me is futile anyways. If only i had brought her along. If only i had read the last chapter. If only i had met him first. If only we had used a condom. If only, If only, If only. Yea, yea.....well you didn't. Find the positive in that and move on.

Gaga?? apparently NOT.

I just realised it's been a while since i shared a day in my life with y'all. Today seems appropriate seeing as i'm in a really shitty mood.

Woke up this morning with the heartbeat earphone by Lady Gaga and Dr Dre on my mind. If you don't know, this is a version of the beats earphone for the ladies and the fashion inclined seeing as it's so cute. Anyway, we all know i'm not the girly type so yea i only wanted it 'cause the chrome ones will go so well with Silver(my blackberry). You see i got this really cool silver(obviously) case for her and she is all pretty and shit. ok so yea i woke up with the earphones on my mind. If you know me at all, you would know that once i've got something on my mind it's kinda hard for me to concentrate on anything else. We all know the earphones are quite pricey but err....i graduated and had my birthday not too long ago. I think i deserve a little "self spoilage" plus i'm a complete music head. i can't think of anything better to get myself lol. Sooooo back to waking up......

Woke up with a smile on my face. It was gonna be a good day right?? well not really. First of all, i had no plans of making any meal but no the father had to have chips and my little family friend had to have rice so yes i ended up cooking and leaving the kitchen smelling like fried potatoes. She of course found a way to not finish her food so i had to play the whole bad cop role. So tiring. We(yes she had to follow me since her usual companion had left the house early and kinda forced her on me not that i'm complaining sha) finally left the house. I had the apple store on my mind seeing as that was the only store that had the earphones with the control talk in store. I need the control talk part 'cause i plan to use it on my blackberry and i've got to receive calls(duh!!). Now the nearest apple store to me wasn't err...exactly near. We had to walk to the bus stop 'cause i'm all about excercising now. The bus ride is supposed to take about thirty minutes on a good day.

*skip forty five minutes*

We get out of the bus and i'm totally confused. I've got no idea where exactly the apple store is.  I also have my money in the wrong currency so i've gotta find an exchange point. Well thanks to technology, we locate both the apple store and the nearest bureau de change. I stand in the queue awaiting my turn and doing my calculations. What?? These people wanna rip me off. I err....quietly get myself and my ward off the line. For that exchange rate, it's not that serious. I decide to go to the apple store anyways despite the fact i'm "right currencyless". I get there and it's total chaos. Apparently everyone decided today was the day they would go to the apple store. I stood in the centre of all the chaos for a good thirty minutes before i finally caught the eye of one of the apple people. You see, i am quite short(and proudly so. make no mistake). So i'm like "do you guys have the heartbeat earphones with control talk?" She is like "wait lemme check in the store".

*skip fifteen minutes*

"No i'm afraid we dont have it". At this point, my anger level is rising. "but you guys said on the website that you had it". She goes "i'm very sorry but it appears we only have it in our online store. You could check hmv". I drag my ward and we head over to hmv. This time, i get noticed almost immediately. I ask for the earphones and they of course have only got the normal ones not the handsfree ones(KILL ME NOW). He now goes on to tell me he in fact has not yet seen the handsfree ones. chai!!. I'm determined the journey cannot be wasted so i go back to the apple store and ask if they can't order it to the store for me. No can do(no surprise there). I'm like "so what do you suggest i do?". They now give me the phone to talk to some dude who is telling me about money wiring all 'cause i haven't got a debit card. Anyways, it comes out at some point that i'm Nigerian and if the sales lady could have gotten any farther away from me, she would have passed through the wall into the next shop. FUCK YOU MUTTALLAB.

We leave the shop and i've got my house on my mind when my ward decides she must have chips and chicken nuggets. Next stop, macdonalds. She goes in and orders some kiddy meal like that. I forget the name. On our way out, we see many people staring at something on the floor. Now my ward is the epitome of an amebo. She must also see. We draw closer and spot the paramedics covering some kid on the floor with a blanket. he is lying face down and doesn't appear to be alive. Now we the unlookers(my ward and i mostly) are busy speculating. did he try to re-enact hancock or did someone push him off the floor above us? Questions we left with or should i say i dragged my ward away with. Next stop, home. We get off at the bus stop closest to the house and walk. THE WRONG WAY. We go about a block before i realise we should have gone in the opposite direction all because i allowed my ward lead the way. Lesson: Never let a ten year old lead the way when you are not paying attention. We re-cross the road and walk all the way back to the bus stop and back home. Now the events that occured after i walked into my house are equally as annoying but quite personal so.....

*skip another four hours*

I am now obsessed with the beats by Dre(tour) in-ear earphones with control talk. They are my style anyways. BLACK and red and yea they can be found at stores near me(what a relief). So yours truly has told the lady gaga version to take it up the butt. There is only so much one can do for matching earphones(silver). The sound quality is the same if not better considering they are a lot more expensive than the Gaga ones.

I will now go to bed dreaming of the soon to be mine tour earphones. Goodnight!!!

From the mouth of the people 2.

The scene is a radio station's studio. They are about to go live with the afternoon's program. In the studio are five women seated with microphones and the appropriate equipments set and ready to go. They are going live in 5,4,3,2,..............
Sarah: Good Afternoon ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to the second episode of from the mouth of the people.  I'm Sarah your host and with me here in the studio are Ivy, Bola, Yetunde and Uduak. *Everyone says hi*

Sarah: Today's topic borders on the male body type. what are we attracted to? I would like to at this point ask all the underage viewers to please go read a book or something. If u choose to continue, you must be over the age of eighteen. ok so ladies which  male body type are you most attracted to?

Uduak: I would have to say a tall dude. Taller than me and i'm 5"10 so....

Sarah: Skinny, Slim, buff, fat, broad???

Uduak: Buff

Sarah: Any particular reason?

Uduak: well i'm not particularly skinny so it works for me.

Sarah: That makes sense. So does this mean you can never get attracted to a skinny dude?

Uduak: Nahh!! I've dated a skinny dude

Sarah: And.....??

Uduak: Nothing. It was cool. lasted 9 months in fact

Sarah: ok. can you repeat it or are you done with the "skinnies"??

Uduak: Lol! Nah! don't matter really. if we click, then all's gravy

Sarah: ok. So we've gone through buff and skinny. Can you date a fat dude?

Uduak: lol! yea. like what fat?

Sarah: hmmmm.........like a bit fatter than Shaq

Uduak: If he is broad and big. i don't mind. he has to be tall though.

Sarah: So who would you say has your ideal body??

Uduak: Lebron James

Sarah: Nice! Bola what's your take on the topic?

Bola: Well i would have to say i'm more into skinny dudes

Sarah: why??

Bola: well...I've never been into the whole "ooo girl, he has muscles" facade. I'm not a big fan of dick but when i do, i love my men taller than me and skinny. They tend to be easy to "play around" with and it's not a myth 'cause they have better looking dicks lol. Generally, it's an attraction thing for me. All my long term crushes are skinny. I'm not prejudiced but yellow boys don't do it for me either.

Sarah: lol! interesting.....so if you were to pick your ideal body, whose would you pick?

Bola: I loved 2pac's body. he was skinny but cut. Allen Iverson is fine too. i think he got bigger though.
Senavoe and Adonis are delicious looking too.

Sarah: Thank you Bola. Yetunde what do you think??

Yetunde: I like the big and buff looking guy

Sarah: Why??

Yetunde: Protection

Sarah: lol!! so you like the bodyguard looking dude

Yetunde: You can use that term

Sarah: So does that mean if a skinny dude were to approach you you wouldn't be interested?

Yetunde: i guess....i'm just biased towards bigger guys that's all.

Sarah: So you can date a fat guy?

Yetunde: Fat ke? err...no. i think not.

Sarah: lol! what if the dude was like extremely fine?

Yetunde: Fat guys aren't fine in my mind. i'll never see a fat person and think he is fine.

Sarah: LOL!! seen. so basically you are allergic to fat??

Yetunde: No. I just meant he may be fine but i wont be able to get past the fat.

Sarah: So who would you say has your ideal body?

Yetunde: Dunno! definitely not Rick Ross though

Sarah: LOL!! ok Ivy what do you think??

Ivy: i like skinny guys

Sarah: why? any particular reasons?

Ivy: well.....three skinny men i've had as boyfriends(ex now) are larger and better i think. I like really skinny. Like the kind of skinny where one arm of mine can go around his waist. i'm kinda on the fleshy side so i prefer a mix. So we just don't both look round together. Skinny men just strike me as easy.

Sarah: By easy you mean?

Ivy: I mean they are more of listeners than talkers. for me, more patient. I also think they shouldn't be underestimated. They ain't weak. It's easy for a lady even after marriage. if you want him fatter, pump him with food. Slim, maintain him.

Sarah: That's quite an interesting contribution. ok it's time for calls now. You know what to do(leave as comments).Hope you've been enjoying the segment so far.....

From the mouth of the people 1.

The scene is a radio station's studio. They are about to go live with the afternoon's program. In the studio are three men and a lady seated with microphones and the appropriate equipments set and ready to go. They are going live in 5,4,3,2,..............
Sarah: Good Afternoon ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to the first episode of from the mouth of the people. Today's topic is fidelity. With me here in the studio are Tinubu, Felix and Ola.
*Everyone says hi*

Sarah: So guys, what's your take on fidelity??


Tinubu: Fidelity amongst married or unmarried couples?

Sarah: Both. Marriage and relationships

Tinubu: well...they are both very different but generally in my opinion if you are with the one person you want to be with, why cheat? but as reality would have it, we almost always have to manage hence the cheating. It's not right but if done, should be kept a secret".

Sarah: I want your personal input not a generaliased view. Like what do you do? Do you cheat when you can or you have never cheated??

Tinubu: I've never cheated before. I've had only one girlfriend and there was no chance to even try so i dont know what i would do. ok let me think seriously.

Sarah: lol. ok while Tinubu is thinking, Ola what's your take on fidelity?

Ola: The bank or the mindset?

Sarah: lol! what do you think?

Ola: For those that can make it happen, more grease to their bumbums

Sarah: So basically you don't believe in fidelity?

Ola: I do but i'm also a realist and in this world we live in now, it's damn near impossible.

Sarah: We are talking about you here. I mean you must have your own values or should i say rules?

Ola: I'd love to be faithful to anyone i'm with but it's almost impossible. I fully expect who i'm with to be faithful to me though. I can't deal with a babe cheating on me.

Sarah: hahahaha!! Isn't that kinda like a double standard? Why is it impossible for you to be faithful?

Ola: I know it is but it is what it is. Look at me. 'cause of my job i come in contact with beautiful women regularly. I'm not a bad looking guy. i do alright with the ladies. I can't run that fast if a babe is offering herself to me.

Sarah: hahahaha!! I see. So basically fidelity is also related to job descriptions??

Ola: At all but some men are more realistically less likely to be faithful.

Sarah: So have you ever cheated and why??

Ola: Yes i have because i could.

Sarah: So the feelings of the person you were with was of no importance to you??

Ola: They never found out. What she didn't know, didn't hurt her.

Sarah: Felix what do you have to say on the matter?

Felix: Fidelity is extremely important. If you can't deal with it, stay single for as long as it takes.

Sarah: Does your definition of fidelity cover relationships or only marriage??

Felix: it covers everything. Afterall the original intent of relationships was to lead to marriage anyways right?

Sarah: You know i find it really difficult to believe guys honour fidelity in relationships

Felix: They should

Sarah: Well what people should do and what they end up doing always varies by a stretch. What do u do personally?

Felix: I believe in fidelity which is why i'm single *smile*

Sarah: LOL! Nice one. Thanks for listening in, we will now take your calls.

If you haven't figured it out, you are listening in on the program and your call should be left as a comment. Your question(s) shall be answered by whoever you direct it at. cheers.......

Can you go a block???

*
She tries her best to cover up the gradually spreading bruise on her face. She makes a mental note to go with Mac powder next time 'cause her mary kay isn't thick enough for this fast becoming norm in her life. She has no idea what set him off this time. Come to think of it, she has no idea what set him off the last time. She can't leave 'cause she swore she wasn't gonna be a divorced woman but wouldn't the sensible thing be to leave before she ended up dying by his hands?? God forbid the last thing she saw be his face. That would indeed be life having his last laugh at her expense.........
*

The abused woman story is becoming quite a norm these days. We now have close friends telling us their personal stories instead of reading it off a magazine or some random self help book. It's now a huge reality we can't close our eyes to anymore. I once asked my friends what they would do if they were in such a situation and they all said they would leave the dude immediately. I laughed at this answer 'cause one of them was in a relationship that could be called abusive and she couldn't end it 'cause she felt she had put too much into the relationship to just back out. They hadn't even thought of the question. All of them were of the opinion there was absolutely nothing to think about. At this point i would like to say that i think that answer is quite naive. Life is not so simple and the women going through different forms of abuse are not all cowards or stupid or don't like their lives. Infact quite the opposite in my opinion. I think they are incredibly courageous. I sometimes put my legs in their shoes and i must say i can't take a single step.

There is a lot to think about when you have a family. At that point, dropping everything and backing out is not an automatic response. You've got to consider your kids and your life at the same time. Someone i regard as a sister once told me she wished her parents had never split up 'cause at the end of the day, it was they the kids that suffered. She now has a terrible complex towards guys. I also have a friend that really has no problem with his parents splitting up. He enjoys not having to spend all his time in one place. He is the only friend of mine from a seperated home that thinks that way though so i believe it's safe to call him special lol(if you're reading this hun you know i've got mad love for you). moving on..........granted some women are quite timid or should i say "backboneless" when it comes to the issue of abuse 'cause they are solely dependent on the man and feel life as they know it(with the abuse) is by far better than the life they would have on their own. While these women are completely entitled to their choices, they sadly however do not fall under my courageous "banner".

The courageous women in my opinion are those that stay and endure everything for a completely selfless reason. It could be 'cause of their kids or religion or even the powerful tool called love and it is for them i say a prayer for occasionally. It must not be easy at all. I know if i was ever in their shoe, i would pack my baggage with my children and FLEE. Mind you that answer has been given after years of careful debate on the topic. I cannot in any way stand abuse and i know even if i'm jobless at the time, my mum would welcome my children joyfully(yes that's how much i've thought about it). That being said, every situation is not the same and if you have to pass judgement, take a moment to go a block in her shoes before you say anything. Life isn't black and white at all.

Your Style, Her Barf!!!

Sometimes i wonder who exactly has the right to dictate what is fashionable/generally acceptable and what isn't. I mean everybody has the right to do what they want to when they want to right?? well YES but on the condition you can accept the fact people will always develop opinions regarding what you do whether you like it or not. If you can't accept this then you've got no business trying to set/follow a trend. I am a strong believer in the fact people do things to seek approval from other people. I can see some of  you shaking your heads 'cause you think you are the royal exception but think about it for a second. C'mon indulge me......

You put up a picture of a Champagne bottle/ specifically take a picture with champagne bottles as your decor not because that is your best drink in the whole wide world or because you have suddenly joined the drink selling industry and are advertising your wares. I could come up with a million and one reasons for this act. Some of them not all bad but i would leave you instead to your imagination.

Now how many of you remember when the ipod was first introduced to us or as i choose to call it, the ipod era. The days when girls didnt need white jewellery anymore 'cause the ipod earphones hung on our necks made up for that. i mean it became a fashion accessory. Everyone who had one made sure you knew they had one. i'm sure some people just went out and bought the earphones 'cause the pressure was getting a tad much lol. I hear the beats headphone by Dr Dre is now the new "ipod earphone". I mean it doubles as a neck support thingy right?? What do you know about dual functionality. I read somewhere that those headphones were made mostly for use in the studio but hey those people obviously knew nothing.

Next up would be the reign of the geeks. Yep!! looking geeky was the new cool. Even if your face is shaped like an owl or a bug you still went out and purchased your very own ultra bug like geek glasses. I mean what would your reputation be like if you weren't up to date with the latest "new" thing.

Lace wigs and the like deserve their very own paragraph. Who can use evostic the most *insert soundtrack*. It is like an epidermic. People took up new trades if you know what i mean so they could afford lace wigs. God forbid you cut your coat according to your size. You just had to have it. I mean everyone else was right??

Now have you stopped shaking your head?? No?? ok lets go on

The dawn of the blackberry. If you have not experienced this, u must live on your very own planet. WHAT?? People did ridiculous things to own a blackberry and if you had one, God forbid you put it on silent. If people can't hear your pings and alerts, why did you buy it?? Its not so bad now though 'cause practically everyone owns one but when our service providers were able to provide blackberry services newly, owning one was big to a lot of people. I mean some people started camouflaging their E71's and other phones to look like blackberrys lol. Take a moment to yell "WHAT?" if you belong to this category. Chameleon toh bad. I mean even till now some people use owning a blackberry as a criteria for dating. No blackberry, cross the road please.

These are just a few of the obvious things i could think of. There are the more subtle ones like eye service/hypocrisy, ass kissing and what i personally call opinion copying/piracy lol. This is simply a case where you photocopy someone's opinion so they feel you are on point.

Disclaimer: I think i have tried my best not to include my personal opinions regarding these issues but if i didn't and you feel i spoke against something you strongly stand for/ is your living ritual then you've just gotta accept the fact i've got a strong opinion(one i obviously couldn't hide) about it and move the *bleep* on and while you're in the accepting mood, accept the fact everybody's got an opinion(good and bad) about it too.

Cheers........................................................

You tell Me............(2)

5.
They had only just resumed their conversation when they heard a crash followed by some shouting. It was kinda muffled ‘cause it was coming from the bathroom. The fact they could hear anything over the sound of the already loud tv told them whatever was wrong was quite serious. He was now really worried. He hoped Mina was ok. If she wasn’t, he was already thinking of ways he could make her feel better. He wasn’t adverse to a little action that night. Uche got up to go check and he offered to follow. He looked at Bimbo and she had a startled expression on her face. Her mouth was wide open. He wasn’t sure if it was ‘cause she was startled or ‘cause she had been talking and the noise caught her midway. He hurried after Uche. They had only just gotten to the toilet door when a very angry Mina stormed out of it. He and Uche started talking at once. “is everything alright??” they both asked. She gave them a look that said does everything look alright? And he immediately realised how stupid their question was. “what is wrong?” Uche asked. “well my artist’s video that was supposed to have premiered tonight will no longer be played. I can’t even understand what the guy is saying over the phone. Something about a different tv station having secured some deal. I’ve gotta call my people. Something isn’t right. I hope you guys won’t be terribly disappointed if I left early” she said. As she was talking he felt terribly disappointed. He hadn’t accounted for her leaving early. Now he’d have to put his moves back on the shelf ‘cause to leave with her would make the other s know he desired her. “of course we would but we can see its kinda an emergency so we understand” he said. “we’ve got your number so we could hang out some other time” Uche chimed in. He nodded. “it’s been a lovely evening and it was nice seeing you guys” she said. She moved towards the living room where a very curious Bimbo was sitted like a rod. “I’ve gotta leave now dear. Something just came up. It was nice seeing you”. She approached Bimbo for a hug picked up her bag and went towards the door. He followed Uche as they saw her out. Offer to drop her off(go to 12), rejoin your mates(go to 16)

6.
“hello! Yes it’s Mina. Why hasn’t the video been played. I hope there is no problem o” “what do you mean by the video wont be played? I thought we had a deal” “what?” “who called you??” “WHAT??” “who secured a deal??” “I can’t hear you Paul. The line seems to be breaking” “hello!! Hello!! HELLO!!” “ARRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!”. “O drat!!” In her anger she had mistakenly pushed down the tumbler that was on the bathroom shank. She was only just noticing it. She opened the bathroom door and there infront of her were Uche and Felix. “is everything alright??” they both asked. She gave them a look that said does everything look alright? and they immediately realised how stupid their question was. “what is wrong?” Uche asked. “well my artist’s video that was supposed to have premiered tonight will no longer be played. I can’t even understand what the guy is saying over the phone. Something about a different tv station having secured some deal. I’ve gotta call my people. Something isn’t right. I hope you guys won’t be terribly disappointed if I left early” she said. “of course we would but we can see its kinda an emergency so we understand” Felix said. “we’ve got your number so we could hang out some other time” Uche chimed in. “it’s been a lovely evening and it was nice seeing you guys” she said. She moved towards the living room where a very curious Bimbo was sitted like a rod. “I’ve gotta leave now dear. Something just came up. It was nice seeing you”. She approached Bimbo for a hug picked up her bag and went towards the door. Both guys followed her out. Accept a ride from Felix(go to 11), hail a taxi(go to 15).

7.
They had only just resumed their conversation when they heard a crash followed by some shouting. It was kinda muffled ‘cause it was coming from the bathroom. The fact they could hear anything over the sound of the already loud tv told them whatever was wrong was quite serious. Both guys got up to go check. She was still trying to recover from being startled. The crash had been quite loud. She stretched her neck trying to make out Mina was saying but she could hear nothing. She immediately reduced the tv volume. “ahh better. Mina must be deaf”. Now she could hear some things. She could hear Felix asking if everything was alright or was it Uche?? She wasn’t sure. Next thing she heard mina babbling. She was talking so fast all she could make out was “having secured some deal. I’ve gotta call my people”. She suddenly smiled. She was sure Mina had just said something about leaving early. Yay!! Finally she could get Uche all to herself. She heard the voices approaching her which meant they were coming back. She immediately sat straight and adjusted her skirt. “I’ve gotta leave now dear. Something just came up. It was nice seeing you” Mina said as she approached her for a hug. She was busy trying to catch Felix’s eye. She just had to know what happened but they were both staring at Mina as they followed her towards the door. (go to 13)

8.
They had only just resumed their conversation when they heard a crash followed by some shouting. It was kinda muffled ‘cause it was coming from the bathroom. The fact they could hear anything over the sound of the already loud tv told them whatever was wrong was quite serious. He wondered what she had broken. He hoped his bathroom was still in pristine condition. He got up to go check and Felix offered to follow. They had only just gotten to the toilet door when a very angry Mina stormed out of it. He and Felix started talking at once. “is everything alright??” they both asked. She gave them a look that said does everything look alright? And he immediately realised how stupid their question was. “what is wrong?” he asked. “well my artist’s video that was supposed to have premiered tonight will no longer be played. I can’t even understand what the guy is saying over the phone. Something about a different tv station having secured some deal. I’ve gotta call my people. Something isn’t right. I hope you guys won’t be terribly disappointed if I left early” she said. “of course we would but we can see its kinda an emergency so we understand” Felix said. “we’ve got your number so we could hang out some other time” he chimed in. Felix nodded. “it’s been a lovely evening and it was nice seeing you guys” she said. She moved towards the living room while he assessed his bathroom. Whew it was only a tumbler. He’d clean that up later. He joined them in the parlour just in time to see her approach Bimbo for a hug, pick up her bag and head towards the door. He followed behind. (go to 10)

For the continuation, watch out for my novel :). Thanks for stopping by.

You tell me..................(1)

Growing up, I was an avid novel reader and I always hated it when novels didn’t end the way I
wanted them to. So today, I’m gonna give y’all the chance to decide how this story ends.
Buckle up people, we’re going IN!!!!!

In a house somewhere in Surulere Lagos, four friends sat down to enjoy each other’s company.
It had been a while since they had all seen themselves. You see, they attended the same
secondary school and hadn’t seen each other since graduation. Uche was now working in an
advertising agency. Bimbo was working in a bank. Felix was unemployed but had just finished
his masters in business administration and was searching for a job. Mina was into the
entertainment industry. She was a public relations personnel. To be Uche, go to 1. To be
Bimbo, go to 2. To be Felix, go to 3 and to be Mina, go to 4.


1.
The sound from the television was quite loud but no one seemed to mind. They all seemed to
be enjoying the music. Soundcity was on point that evening. It had been ages since he had
seen all of them and he couldn’t stop staring at everyone. Mina had blossomed into a beautiful
woman. He couldn’t believe it. She had been such a tomboy in high school. Felix was still his
short self and Bimbo seemed to be louder than ever if that was even possible. He figured it was
probably ‘cause the tv was so loud but with her you never knew. He just realized everyone was
staring at him. Apparently Bimbo had been asking him a question. “pardon??”. What are you
doing now?? She repeated. “ o I work with an advertising agency”. What do you do there??
Felix asked. “I’m responsible for bringing in new clients. I’m kinda like the advertiser of our
advertising company lol”. That’s so cool Bimbo said. I’m stuck in my boring bank job *sigh*. He
wondered if Mina never spoke but just then, her phone rang. She immediately answered it and
excused herself. (go to 8)


2.
The sound from the television was quite loud but no one seemed to mind. They all seemed to
be enjoying the music. Soundcity was on point that evening. It had been ages since she had
seen all of them and she couldn’t stop talking. The tv wasn’t really helping so she had to raise
her voice. She’d tried reducing the volume earlier but Mina wanted them to see the video of
one of the artists she was representing not like she really cared. Nigerian music wasn’t really
her thing. Felix was still his cute short self but she was more interested in Uche. “what are
you doing now??” she asked. He wasn’t listening. He kept staring at Mina’s boobs. The bitch. “
what are u doing now??” she screamed. He seemed startled. “pardon??”. What are you doing
now?? She repeated. “ o I work with an advertising agency”. What do you do there?? Felix
asked. “I’m responsible for bringing in new clients. I’m kinda like the advertiser of our
advertising company lol”. “That’s so cool” she thought and said. “I’m stuck in my boring bank
job “*sigh*. Just then, Mina’s phone rang. She immediately answered it and excused herself.(go
to 7)


3.
The sound from the television was quite loud but no one seemed to mind. They all seemed to
be enjoying the music. Soundcity was on point that evening. It had been ages since he had
seen all of them and he was just taking it in. Everyone except Bimbo seemed to have changed.
Mina kept drawing his attention and he noticed Uche was as distracted as he was. Bimbo was
talking and she suddenly shouted. That brought him right out of his thoughts. Apparently she
was asking Uche what he was doing at the moment. “ o I work with an advertising agency” he
said. He was immediately interested. He had been looking for a job since he got back from the
states. Apparently even with his masters degree, the job market was a brutal place. He had
gone for so many interviews he felt he was cursed. Maybe Uche could help. “What do you do
there??” he asked . “I’m responsible for bringing in new clients. I’m kinda like the advertiser of
our advertising company lol” Uche replied. Bimbo said something about it being cool and her
job but he was too preoccupied with his own thoughts. He didn’t even hear Mina’s phone ring.
He just saw her get up with the phone to her ear. She looked worried.(go to 5)


4.
The sound from the television was quite loud but no one seemed to mind. They all seemed to
be enjoying the music. Soundcity was on point that evening. It had been ages since she had
seen all of them but that was the furthest thing from her mind. With her job in PR, she was
always working. At that moment, she was having a conversation on her blackberry with one of
the soundcity people. Her artist’s video which was supposed to have premiered thirty minutes
ago had still not been shown. “FUCK!!” her Mtn blackberry service had started pms(ing) again.
Her messages weren’t delivering. She was aware the other people were talking and she caught
something about an advertising company and a bank but she was too worried to be bothered.
She hoped there was no problem. She noticed the men kept staring at her and she just smiled.
She was used to that already. Bimbo on the other hand kept giving her Malicious glances but
she had no idea what that was about. She made a mental note to ask as soon as she was alone
with her. Her phone rang. It was the soundcity guy. She hoped whatever was wrong could be
fixed easily(she believed every problem had a solution). She excused herself and went to a
private place to answer the call.(go to 6)


To be continued………………………………….

The silent Companion!!!

So today I was talking with my dad and I complained about my wrist. You see its been hurting
recently and my brother thinks its 'cause I never drop my blackberry. Anyways, I told my dad
about what my brother thought and he said "I'm sure that's the reason. You people now treat
your phones like companions".

As usual, I have given this sentence much thought. Are our phones now replacing our friends
in our lives?? I mean they can do practically everything. Yes I have conversations with my
phone and her name is Silver. Some of you that follow my blog already know this. I mean if
anything were to happen to my phone, I'd be completely devastated. Many people call this the
blackberry fever but I beg to differ. I have many friends that use nokias and they don't drop
their phones either lol.

Today's technology is so evolved that with the right devices, you can practically make your
money without having to leave the comforts of your home. Thank God for delivery services(for
dudes and the lazy girls). Bye bye to starvation. Bye bye to laundry. Bye bye to agro(ok I kid)
but some of you err...have your "agro reliever" delivered lol.

I wonder what it must have been like for our parents back in the day when they had to wait
for telegrams and had to do everything themselves. Granted communication was much more
difficult then but I believe u can't miss what you don't know exists. If they took any of us in
this generation back there, I can guarantee the fellow will most definitely contemplate suicide
lol.

Yes my phone is my companion and I'd only trade her in for a more recent model :p.

Vanity or Necessity??

So I'm watching Dr 90210 with my brother and I go "hey why don't you branch into plastic
surgery 'cause you'll be really good at it". You see he is an amazing artist. Draws all kinds of
stuff and he is really creative. He goes "nope I don't like it. I want to feel like I just saved your
life in some way not like I just gave you a new boob or a new butt".

I have been thinking about what he said for the past 30mins. I'm still thinking about it as I
type this post. Firstly, I don't think plastic surgery is all about boob enhancements and sex
changes. Burn victims benefit from plastic surgery. Cleft Palate patients benefit from it too.
Plastic surgery is all about vanity yes but not all bad vanity(yes there is good vanity).
Everyone has the right to look normal. No one wants to stand out in a bad way.

Looking good boosts your self confidence whether you agree with me or not so I don't have any
problem with people that feel they need a lip enhancement or a brazilian butt. I am not in
their shoes so I choose not to judge. Granted many of these surgeries are completely
unnecessary but when you think about how harsh society is today, I believe if you can afford
it, get it. Now I know some of you are frowning at this but think about it. You stare when you
pass by a dude with so many flabs he looks like a dunlop tyre warehouse. You make fun of the
women that have got slippers for boobs. Why on earth shouldn't they do something about it if
they can??

Ok Big Brother all stars just started so I'mma stop there. Your views on the topic are very
welcome though. Cheers!!!

Love in it's purest form!!!

I said i wasn't gonna comment on the events of yesterday concerning a leaked nude photo of a Nigerian artist but as i was about to start typing this post, my friend put a cd in the player and the next thing i heard was "its Wande Coal.....mohits!!". I'm taking that as a sign lol. So here are my 2cents on the matter. He sould fire his publicist. I mean if as a publicist you cannot lie like your life fucking depends on it, then you don't deserve the job. That is all. Moving on..............

I was watching a movie last night and the following conversation took place between two men and a little boy

Adult 1: I want some peace and quiet
Adult 2: Well I'll be quiet
Child:     and I'll be peace(giggles).

I thought this was soooooo cute. what?? sue me jo. i swear i grinned for like 10mins or more lol. Got me thinking(i'm sure one of you just went "here we go again" lol). As i was saying, got me thinking (:p), why is it some babies are born so cute and adorable while others have got absolutely nothing going for them. Is it that the "unfortunate" ones cheated in the race of the sperms. Maybe they were the ones that were trying to trip the other sperms or tied tails together so the other sperms kept tripping and for every naughty deed they did, they ugliness rate increased lol. Think about it. I can just imagine how the poor egg must have felt seeing the very ugly but determined sperm rushing towards her. While on this train of thought i also imagined what exactly made some kids so troublesome. I decided it had absolutely nothing to do with the sperms. I have not decided who to blame for that yet. You will know as soon as i know *silly grin*.

Anyways, shoutout to those mothers that don't out of fright drop their baby at first glance and furthermore accept the fact that they'll be looking at that face till they die(if eveything goes acording to plan) with a huge smile. Bigger shoutout to those that don't switch their kid with the adorable baby in the next crib when they feel none of the nurses are looking. Biggest shoutout to the ones that dont pack up their umbilical cord with their baggage and flee the hospital in the dead of the night. That is love jo. What???

We are Fortunate!!!

His name is Paul and no one gave him the name. It just grew on him for lack of a better explanation. When he burst out of that cocoon of a shell, his mother was nowhere to be found. Infact I think his mother and his father are one and the same. Little Paul wasn't alone though, there were other little Pauls around(the name was popular). Now little Paul loved the dark but he was always moving towards the light. I cannot for the life of me explain why. His one valuable trait was that he could play dead. All the little Pauls were fantastic actors. Their bodies were of some hard substance so they could withstand a lot of hitting(I personally have carried out this experiment). Infact that's when their ability to play dead becomes useful(I digress).

Little Paul was still in the dump of his birth with all the other little Pauls. They had no idea what their purpose in life was so they just scurried around. He found out the hard way that his supposed brothers(this has still not been verified) were sellouts. I mean they could betray any of their kind just to stay alive. He almost got caught in that trap once. You see, since they all look alike if you are trying to kill his "brother" and the so called brother runs towards the direction he is hiding, you'd easily mistake him for his brother. It was every cockroach for himself up there. It was a lonely life I tell you. No one trusted anyone, no one needed to be romantically involved with anyone. It was a world of chaos. Now Paul didn't know any better so he accepted his life as it was and ran and avoided and played dead till one day, the owner of his "abode" watched a Raid insecticide advert on the television. That was it for Paul.

Now do you value your life more?? Do you know how fortunate you are to have been born human??. Maybe next time you think of ending it all, you'd think about Paul whose sole purpose in life was to hide. No condition is permanent.